[Warning: racial stereotypes. No hatred is intended here. It is presented in original form as a part of music history.]
a darktown “calldown”, 1899
words and music by Deas and Wilson
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The sheet music:
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Accompaniment:
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Lyrics
1. In a quiet little noisy flat
Just off Fifth Avenue
Lived a dusky couple and to one another
They seemed always so true
Their flat had been furnished out complete
Upon the installment plan
But like all colored folks try to do
Always dodge the installment man
So the collector, he got tired of that
And straight-away he went
And had a sheriff seize everything
And put them out without a cent
As the collector drove away, he said
“A great dodger some day you’ll be
But let me see if you can dodge this snow and cold
The same way you tried to dodge me”
Chorus
Oh! my, this kind of living is certainly a-killing me
Eating snowballs ain’t what it is cracked up to be
Now I’m going to live on the European plan
‘Cause I’m tired of dodging dat ‘stallment man
2. Most everybody knows that Sally Few-clothes
Is the nicest gal in town
Last night she gave a swell party
And invited swell coons from all around
Among the most distinguished guest
Was Eph Jones and his Linda Roe
And they were dressed in the latest style
From their hair down to their toes
Just as the fun was at its height
A white man came into the room
Then Eph and Linda they made for the window
But were caught a little too soon
The white man said that they had bought their clothes
On the ‘stallment plan a month ago
And as they failed to pay their dues to their homes
In barrels, they must go
Chorus
Oh! my, this sporting life is certainly a-killing me
Walken home in barrels ain’t what it is cracked up to be
Now I’m going to live on the second hand plan
‘Cause I’m tired of dodging dat ‘stallment man
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Sung here by Fred Feild: