[WARNING: This song contains antiquated racial stereotypes. It is presented here for historical and educational purposes only.]
A 1902 popular song
Words and music by J. Fred Helf
The sheet music:
Accompaniment by James Pitt-Payne:
Lyrics
1. Bill Johnson’s wife said, “Man, since you’ve been old enough to vote
You’ve promised me a lot of things I never got
You’ve promised me a di’mond pin, a gown and seal-skin coat
You’re nothin’ but a promisory note
You’re just dat fond of work you’d lay beside it in a doze
Tobacco odor is the only scent dat’s in your clothes
From now on, money talks with me, it’s got to speak its line”
Bill rubbed his chin as he replied, “It ain’t no friend of mine”
Chorus:
If money talks, it ain’t on speakin’ terms with me
It don’t get close enough for such familiarity
I’ve coaxed it, but it wouldn’t come
So, I’m convinced it’s deaf and dumb
If money talks, it ain’t on speaking terms with me
2. Bill got a job and worked a month as hard as hard could be
But when payday came round the place burned to the ground
Bill watched it burn and said, “Dat’s one month’s pay I’ll never see
Guess money don’t want my society
If money does converse, it speaks in Spanish, French or Greek
Or some queer foreign tongue dat I don’t understand or speak
I’d like to have a nickel take my hand and say, “How do?”
I’d love to hear a dollar bill say, “I belong to you”
Sung here by Fred Feild: