Don’t You Think You’d Like To Fondle Me

[WARNING: This song contains antiquated racial stereotypes. It is presented here for historical and educational purposes only.]

A popular song from 1900.
Words and music by Hughie Cannon.


The sheet music:


Accompaniment by James Pitt-Payne:


Lyrics

1. Train left Chicago, just at half past two
I was in de chair car bound for Kalamazoo
Fell right asleep den feeling kinder blue
I awoke when a big fat wench was getting kinder new
She called me lovey dovey, said I’se her angel food
She kept on getting closer and look’d in a pensive mood
I said, “Go way back lady
Now please don’t come so near”
She paid no ‘tention to what I said
But she whispered in my ear

Chorus
“Don’t you think you’d like to fondle me
Dem bubbling lips just suit me to a tee
I don’t like to grumble, but can’t you take a tumble
Don’t you think you’d like to fondle me?”

2. Went home next ebening went to see a show
Took my opera glasses sat down in the front row
Pick’d up a programme, first thing dat I know
Dat same wench what was on dat train
Was featured in dat show
She got thro’ wid de first song
I said, “Dat’s very good”
I felt just like applauding, but I didn’t think I would
She said, “I’ll sing a new song, it’s something ’bout a coon”
I felt like falling thro’ the seat
When she sprang dat same old tune