[WARNING: This song contains antiquated racial language. It is presented here for historical and educational purposes only.]
A comic tale told by a rube new to the city, 1892
words by Charles H. Hoyt
music by Percy Gaunt
This was in a musical called A Trip to Chinatown. The Bowery was a street in lower Manhattan. It was also the neighborhood around the street where theater life flourished from 1860 to 1875. By the 1880s it had become a sordid district with flop houses, dance halls, and pawnshops, with very few theaters. This song warns of that decline.
The sheet music:
Accompaniment:
Lyrics
1. Oh! the night that I struck New York
I went out for a quiet walk
Folks who are “on to” the city say
Better by far that I took Broadway
But I was out to enjoy the sights
There was the Bowery a-blaze with lights
I had one of the devil’s own nights!
I’ll never go there any more!
Chorus
The Bowery, the Bowery
They say such things, and they do strange things
On the Bowery! the Bowery
I’ll never go there any more!
2. I had walk’d but a block or two
When up came a fellow and me he knew
Then a policeman came walking by
Chased him away and I asked him why?
“Wasn’t he pulling your leg,” said he
Said I “He never laid hands on me!”
“Get off the Bowery you Yep!” said he
I’ll never go there any more!
3. I went into an auction store
I never saw any thieves before
First he sold me a pair of socks
Then said he, “how much for the box?”
Someone said “two dollars!” I said “three!”
He emptied the box and gave it to me
“I sold you the box, not the socks,” said he
I’ll never go there any more!
4. I went into a concert hall
I didn’t have a good time at all
Just the minute that I sat down
Girls began singing “New Coon in Town”
I got up mad and spoke out free
“Somebody put that man out,” said she
A man called a bouncer attended to me
I’ll never go there any more!
5. I went into a barber shop
He talk’d till I thought he would never stop
I, “Cut it short,” he misunderstood
Clipp’d down my hair just as close as he could
He shaved with a razor that scratched like a pin
Took off my whiskers and most of my chin
That was the worst scrape I ever got in
I’ll never go there any more!
6. I struck a place that they called a “dive”
I was in luck to get out alive
When the policeman heard my woes
Saw my black eyes and my battered nose
“You’ve been held up!” said the “copper” fly!
“No, sir! but I’ve been knocked down!” said I
Then he laughed, tho’ I couldn’t see why!
I’ll never go there any more!
Sung here by Fred Feild: