A farce about country folks, 1900.
words by J. Cheever Goodwin
music by Maurice Levi
A Reuben or rube, not a person named Reuben, is a country bumpkin, an unsophisticated rustic. This ridiculous song came from a 1900 musical called In Central Park. It makes a point that outsiders better watch out or they could be taken advantage of in New York City where life was fast and tricky.
The sheet music:
Accompaniment by James Pitt-Payne:
Lyrics
- A Reuben from the country came to town the other day
You’ve heard of Reubens just like that before
His clothes were rather seedy and his whiskers long and gray
You’ve heard of whiskers just like that before
The cabby that he chooses from the crowd that ’round him flock
You’ve heard of cabbies just like that before
Only charges him five dollars for a ride of seven blocks
You’ve heard of charges just like that before
Chorus
When Reuben comes to town, he is sure to be done brown
It’s really very shocking and the fact we should deplore
But it can’t be helped alas, when a chump’s as green as grass
He’ll meet the fate of hundreds who have gone before
- Next morning with a wallet packed with many juicy “Vs”
You’ve heard of wallets just like that before
Reuben started for a saunter up Broadway, the sights to see
You’ve heard of saunters just like that before
A perfect lady met him, who, alas! had lost her way
You’ve heard of ladies just like that before
“Would Reuben as a favor see her home to Avenue A?”
You’ve heard of favors just like that before - The lady was a widow, she explained as they walked East
You’ve heard of widows just like that before
She invited Reuben in to see the cozy flat she leased
You’ve heard of cozy flats like her’s before
They had a glass of cider, and the next thing Reuben knew
You’ve heard of cider just like that before
He was being told to “come on!” by a gentleman in blue
You’ve heard of “come ons” just like that before - Reuben had an awful headache, his mind was in a haze
You’ve heard of headaches just like that before
When the judge remarked next morning
“It’s ten dollars or ten days”
You’ve heard remarks of just that sort before
He wired his wife for money, with some fairytale excuse
You’ve heard excuses just like that before
But she answered, “Not a penny!
If you’re broke, walk home you goose!”
You’ve heard of answers just like that before
Sung here by Fred Feild: