What Fools We Mortals Be

From a 1908 musical based on the cartoon “Little Nemo”.
Words by Harry B. Smith.
Music by Victor Herbert.


The sheet music:


Accompaniment by James Pitt-Payne:


Lyrics

  1. I’m just about the jolliest King that ever was on view
    I reign in Slumberland, in manner blithe and bland
    My subjects think I am a joke and I think I am, too
    And so we get along, our life one comic song
    From Slumberland I get of earth a kind of Birds-eye view
    Those fellows on the earth, provoke my royal mirth
    When I see all the funny things those human critters do
    I giggle up my royal sleeve and chuckle quite a few

They are a joke, ha, ha, ha, ha
An awful joke, ha, ha, ha, ha
They are better than a minstrel show to me
How I laugh in royal glee
Ho, ho, ho, he, he, he, he
Oh what fools, oh my what fools those mortals be
How he laughs in royal glee
Ha, ha, ha, he, he, he, he
Oh what fools, oh my what fools those mortals be

  1. I see the av’rage business man a-working hard all day
    He does not need more dough, he likes to hustle though
    He’s got the habit, hates to see a nickel get away
    He’s trying now to snare, some other fellows share
    At fifty he’s a wreck, dyspepsia, gout and heart disease
    He can’t have any fun, but, say he has a son
    And Willie gets his papa’s cash and blows it in with ease
    While daughter spends her share to buy a titled piece of cheese

They are a joke, ha, ha, ha, ha
A lovely joke, ha, ha, ha, ha
They are better than a pantomime to me
How I laugh in royal glee
Ho, ho, ho, he, he, he, he
Oh what fools, oh my what fools those mortals be
How he laughs in royal glee
Ha, ha, ha, he, he, he, he
Oh what fools, oh my what fools those mortals be


Sung here by Vancha March: