A popular song from 1911.
Words by Edgar Leslie.
Music by Lewis F. Muir.
The sheet music:
Accompaniment by James Pitt-Payne:
Lyrics
- From California to the coast of Maine
They talk of ragtime driving folks insane
But there is just one tune that gets your brain
So muddled that you go upon a six months’ jag
If you are single, you may hear it soon
It’s just a simplified old fashioned tune
That starts you off upon your honeymoon
The Matrimony Rag
Chorus
It makes you tell your wife
You’ll be a “boob” for life
And that you’ll hand her all your pay
Then she buys silken hose
And lots of fancy clothes
To make a big grandstand display
And while she looks so cute
You have to wear a suit
That hangs upon you like a bag
Then if you say you want to be the boss
She gets an absolute divorce
And you, just like a phony pay her alimony
That’s the Matrimony Rag
- You hear her say, “Now, dear, after we’re wed
I’ll do the housework,” but you find instead
You have to bring her breakfast up to bed
And then you have to wash the dishes or she’ll nag
Then when her mother comes to get your goat
You get so mad you want to out the throat
Of Mister Mendelsohn, the man who wrote
The Matrimony Rag
Sung here by Laurence Rubenstein: