Happy Rhymes

A funny ditty
From the 1892 operatic extravaganza “Sinbad”
Words and music by John D. Gilbert


The sheet music:


Accompaniment by Fred Feild:


Lyrics

  1. Oh, there was a man in our town he had a wooden leg
    And his pie he had to beg, Ri doodle doodle doo
    If you didn’t drop a nickle he would take a cent at that
    You could drop it in his hat, Whack fol de roll de rah
    This man who had the wooden leg, his tooth it gave him pain
    At first the dentist couldn’t pull the tooth so tried again
    He yelled so loud the dentist thought he really was insane
    So he pulled the other leg, Hi dumty ro ral loo
  2. Oh, there was a man he had an eye, he bought it in a store
    And they hadn’t any more, Ri too-ral loo-ral loo
    One eye was like an eagle’s, but he was deaf and dumb
    And the other eye was “bum”, Oh hoop de dooden doo
    He tried to mash a girl one day, as she was passing by
    She passed him on the wrong side where he had the showcase eye
    She gave him quite a winning smile but he could not reply
    For he couldn’t wink the glass, rowdle rowdle dow
  3. Oh the boy stood on the burning deck in my school-book I’ve read
    Ri doodle doodle doo, When he should have been in bed
    If I had been his father for standing on the deck
    Right fol de fol de fol, I’d have stood upon his neck
    A little game of poker for to pass the time away
    His father and some other fellows wanted for to play
    But they couldn’t get the cards because the boy stood in the way
    Yes, he stood upon the deck, Ri too-ral loo-ral loo
  4. I want to be an angel, and with the angels stand
    With a trombone in my hand, Ta rat ta rah ta rah
    Angels have an easy time, of that there is no doubt
    They only fly about, De doodle lidle la
    A man today was talking and he must have had a fight
    The party whom he quarreled with I don’t think it was right
    He’ll never go to heaven of that I’m certain quite
    For he said he struck an angel, Ri too-ral loo-ral loo
  5. A basket covered demi-john, outside a druggist’s store
    It was standing near the door, Ta rumpty rumpty rum
    It was full of vitriol, it didn’t need a shelf
    It could take care of itself, Whack fol de rol de ray
    A tramp one night was passing and in front of it did dwell
    He thought that it was whisky straight, of course he couldn’t tell
    He darnk about a half o’pint and then he let a yell
    Now he’s burning up inside, Ta rum te rum te ray
  6. A balky mule stood near a railroad crossing on the track
    With a man upon his back, Hoopty dooden doo
    A train was fast approaching, but the mule kept up his balk
    So the man said, “I will walk”, Diddle doodle doo
    The mule he kept on balking and standing in the way
    His muleship heard the whistle no attention did he pay
    But when the train it reached him he hadn’t much to say
    And the man is walking yet, Humpy dumpy doodle day
  7. “Oh, I’ll never chew tobacco, no” said little Robert Reed
    “It is such a filthy weed”, Deedle deedy deedle dee
    Because my papa told me it was awful on the nerves
    So, I’d rather chew preserves”, Roody doody reedle dee
    Now Robert’s father was so old himself, he used to pride
    On chewing much tobacco and on drinking “booze” beside
    But Robert, when he was quite young, he doubled up and died
    From smoking cigarettes, Whack doodle diddle do
  8. Oh, I knew a nice Chicago girl, her feet were all her own
    Yes, and she could walk alone, Hoop eh diddle doodle do
    I saw her in a restaurant waiting on a table there
    For she couldn’t find a chair, Ri dee diddle fol de ray
    Then afterwards she was cashier and got to own the place
    A street car conductor went to pay his check, ’twas just a “case”
    He paid the bill in pennies, but she threw them in his face
    And the “dust” got in his eyes, Fol der rol der rol der ray