Featured in “The Merry Widow” and also “The Devil”, 1908.
Words by Edgar Selden.
Music by Melville J. Gideon.
Theme suggested by Al. Carlton.
The sheet music:
Accompaniment:
Lyrics
- When ever I hear church bells chime
It means one of two things
Somebody’s got the halter
Or a soul has taken wings
Yet I know plenty “dead ones”
Who’d be glad enough to die
Could they escape the matrimony
They thought they would try
Chorus
Gee! ain’t I glad I’m single
Gee! ain’t I glad I’m free
Go, when I feel like going
Stay, where I want to be
I am tied up to no one
No one keeps tabs on me
Gee! ain’t I glad I’m single
Gee! ain’t I glad I’m free
- When you are wed, your mate will say
“I love you heart and soul”
Then lets you bring the children up
And lug the wood and coal
You’re told your eyes are “Heaven’s Blue”
No compliments you lack
But let the first blamed thing go wrong
And both your eyes are blacked
Chorus
Gee! ain’t I glad I’m single
Gee! ain’t I glad I’m free
Don’t have to eat “Home Cooking”
Then pay a Doctor’s fee
Do what I feel like doing
No one to jump on me
Gee! ain’t I glad I’m single
Gee! ain’t I glad I’m free
- This marriage game is all a bunk
And you go spend your cash
To fill a flat with costly junk
And then get fed on hash
Some claim, if you are married
You live longer, that’s a stall
You really don’t live longer
It seems longer, that is all
Chorus
Gee! ain’t I glad I’m single
Gee! ain’t I glad I’m free
No string of bum relations
Living for life, off me
No kids, the whole night squalling
Lights out, so you can’t see
Gee! ain’t I glad I’m single
Gee! ain’t I glad I’m free
- I know a married couple though
That really make me sick
The way they goo-goo and yum-yum
You’d want to throw a brick
I think they carry things too far
Their love’s so hit, it melts
But then they’re married, yes, they are
But each to someone else
Chorus
Gee! ain’t I glad I’m single
Gee! ain’t I glad I’m free
Don’t have to hire detectives
No one to “shadow” me
No need to make excuses
Carry my own door key
Gee! ain’t I glad I’m single
Gee! ain’t I glad I’m free
- King Solomon, as we’ve been told
Was sure one wise old man
And how he ran one thousand wives
I’d like to learn his plan
The dresses worn in those days, though
Were made just like a sack
What would he do, if they wore shirt waists
Buttoned up the back?
Chorus
Gee! ain’t I glad I’m single
Gee! ain’t I glad I’m free
No “Going home to Mother”
Each time you disagree
No one to knock and nag you
No “Hell on Earth” for me
Gee! ain’t I glad I’m single
Gee! ain’t I glad I’m free